The whole day I have been thinking about our tradition called “Ala Kachuu” (Bride Kidnapping). The reason is that in the morning I was told about two cases of kidnapping the bride. First case happened with eldest sister of my close friend, while she was in Bishkek with her mother. Second case – with my acquaintance while she was standing at a bus stop (I have last seen her couple of days ago and she was single, but now she is married. Isn’t it insane?). Even though both cases are pure acts of Ala Kachuu, they totally differ from each other by the content and purpose.

First case: My friend’s family is big and there are four girls. It happened with her eldest sister. She is 28 and was not married. In Kyrgyz culture, if a woman gets older than 22 she is considered to be over the hill. So she was way, way over the hill. She went to Bishkek (she lives in Osh) with her mother to visit relatives. After their being in Bishkek for couple of days, her mother suggested her to meet with one young man, very intelligent and clever, according to mother’s words. She refused saying that she didn’t trust people of Bishkek. Mother suggested that she would escort her. Shortly after, they met at a café. When mother was gone to restroom, intelligent young man kidnapped her daughter. Last week they married.

Second case: The end of the work day. She just finished her work and was standing at a bus stop waiting for “marshrutka” (mini bus). Usually, it takes up to 5 minutes to the marshrutka to come, but on that unfortunate day it was late. Suddenly, a car drove near the place where she was standing. The front passenger side window rolled down and a young man introduced himself as a friend of her brother and suggested to drive her home as it was getting dark. She was familiar with all friends of her brother. He didn’t look like one of them and she politely refused. What followed was a real nightmare for her. Two men from back seats and one from front came out of the car and forced her inside the car. Even though she resisted fighting back using everything she could, she was helpless against three men. In half an hour, she was at “groom’s” house resisting his female relatives who were desperately trying to put veil on her head (which means woman “agrees” to marry her kidnapper). Two hours later, she was sitting on the corner of the room with a white veil on her head. They married recently.

In the first case, she liked the guy, and was conscious of her being “over the hill”. Therefore, she agreed to be kidnapped. The second case represents Ala Kachuu by illegal means, as she was against it.
Ala Kachuu is considered to be an old tradition of Kyrgyz and some other ethnic groups in Central Asia.

People say it is is really old, but no one can tell how old it is, although, in the Kyrgyz epic “Manas”, millennial of which was celebrated in 1995, the act of Ala Kachuu is not mentioned. Ala Kachuu is when a “future groom” abducts his “future wife” by means of force or deceit takes her home, where his female relatives force the “bride” to wear a veil. Usually, kidnapped women force back, but unbearable pressure from the “groom’s” relatives and the thought that she has to stay (tradition!) make her weak. Once the girl has put a veil on, she has no other options but to stay. The fact is that more than 90 % of kidnapped women stay. Tradition dictates that once girl passes the threshold of her kidnapper, she has to stay, otherwise she will be cursed and her entire life will be miserable. Another reason why kidnapped women stay is enormous pressure from society, as Ala Kachuu is commonly considered to be a tradition of our ancestors, and it is a great public shame for a girl and her parents if she leaves. In Central Asian cultures, being publicly ashamed is equal to being “dead.” Therefore, very often women who wouldn’t stay become outcasts of society. It should also be pointed out that girls, once they are kidnapped, are not considered to be pure (virgin) any more, as in most cases when kidnapped girls refuse to stay, the “grooms” end up raping them, and virginity is an important factor in making a family. Therefore, there are also some cases when kidnapping ends tragically, e.g. girls could not stand it and committed suicide.

Usually, Ala Kachuu is when man forces woman to marry him without her consent. Though, there are cases when man kidnaps his beloved, as his or her parents didn’t agree on their marriage. Also, marriage by Ala Kachuu is cheaper for man, because he is free to pay dowry to woman’s parents.

Today, Ala Kachuu is a big question that worries women in Kyrgyzstan, especially in remote areas. Even though Kyrgyzstan is considered to be a democratic country where all people are granted their rights and the act of bride kidnapping is illegal, the government is very reluctant to fight against this illegal action. When I speak about our officials fighting against bride kidnapping, I always remember the soviet movie “The Caucasus Captive,” where the major of the city in one of Caucasus countries “struggles” against such “uncivilized” traditions, but meanwhile hires gangs to kidnap a girl for the purpose of marriage. One could make the same movie in Kyrgyzstan too. High government officials say that it is illegal and we must struggle against it, but they take no action when it occurs. I guess there is a conflict of interest, because altoughou law dictates Ala Kachuu is illegal it is widely accepted as a tradition and in Central Asia traditions constitute the essential part of daily life, and people follow them very faithfully.

Officially, the rights of women are protected by the Kyrgyz Criminal Code. Moreover, there is a range of international laws that protect women’s rights like Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination against Women and the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Nevertheless, despite all the laws that sanction taking radical action to eliminating bride kidnapping, in real life almost no one appeals to the courts on the issue.

In conclusion, I would like to say that even though it is a tradition, Ala Kachuu is officially considered to be an illegal action. Moreover, we should admit the fact that Ala Kachuu infringes on women’s rights. Any lawful citizen of Kyrgyzstan would say that it’s bad, but still keep in mind that it is a tradition of their ancestors. So there is conflict of choice between obeying the law and following the tradition. Therefore, there are lots of debates on whether bride kidnapping is justified or not. It is really hard to find solution to this problem, so I will leave the judgment to readers.